Melbourne is sick.
And I’m not talking about in a 1980s surfer boy kind of way.
Is it terminal? You’d like to say it can be healed.
But it’s going to take some tough and gutsy decisions by people who have proven records of making insipid ones.
Any crime reporter in Melbourne today will share the same stories.
People ask if crime in Melbourne is worse than ever, or are we just reporting it more?
It’s a mixed response. We are reporting on crime more because there’s more happening – there’s actually so much of it that we can’t keep up.
Believe it or not, many violent offences are going straight through to the wicketkeeper, with the public kept in the dark.
Melbourne has long been famous for its coffee culture, fashion and charming laneways. Now it’s more known for its crime and economic woes
Melburnians and tourists alike in Melbourne’s Degraves Street which is full of cafes, restaurants and boutique shopping
Sushi chef Wan-Ting Lai was allegedly stabbed in Melbourne’s CBD by Lauren Darul while walking to work
Lauren Darul (above)
The crime statistics tell the story.
The thing about statistics is they can be interpreted in all kinds of ways and over the years Victoria Police has told us all the stats look bad because they’re doing such a great job at catching crooks.
I won’t bore you with too many details, but have a glance at the latest figures for a cold shower of reality.
Last month, official stats showed Victoria recorded 638,640 criminal offences, which was up 15.7 per cent from the previous year.
Then we had 483,583 recorded criminal incidents – up 18.3 per cent – marking the highest figures since records began in 2004-05.
The crime rate rose 13.8 per cent to 8,998.9 offences per 100,000 people.
It’s horrifying stuff and Melburnians are talking about it. A lot.
Just head down the pub, if you have the guts, and violent crime is the talk of the town.
It’s touched so many people – some directly, while for others, it’s in the back of their minds.
Crime is a mind game.
Melbourne on Friday nights is still bustling. People head out after work for a drink and many look forward to catching up with friends and colleagues during the warmer months.
And why not? It’s been a long and cold winter compounded by endless tales of death, violence and misery.
The alleged stabbing of sushi chef Wan-Ting Lai as she innocently made her way to work in Melbourne’s CBD on October 2 did nothing to improve the mental health of a population already on edge.
CCTV showed the moment Lauren Darul allegedly plunged a knife into the 36-year- old’s chest on Little Bourke Street, puncturing her lung and leaving her hunched over on the street.
It took weeks for the footage to come out despite Darul still being at large.
People are still talking about it now. The footage was so raw, so chilling – and ordinary folk know it could have been them.
Television news has no shortage of video to run involving violent crimes in Melbourne
Social media is awash with images of violent crime happening across Melbourne everyday
Saurabh Anand almost had his hand cut off by an alleged machete wielding thug as he simply went down to the chemist at shopping centre in Melbourne’s west in July
So how did it get so bad?
Everyone has a different idea about that.
Some blame the police, others blame the politicians, while many simply blame deadbeat parents.
There is no denying kids are out of control.
Children aged 10-17 represent 13.1 per cent of all offenders, but are significantly overrepresented in serious violent crimes.
They accounted for 63.1 per cent of robberies and 46 per cent of aggravated burglaries in the last bunch of stats.
Police arrested 7,414 children a total of 24,550 times, with a small group of ‘hardened young offenders’ driving much of the repeat violent offending.
Youth crime has reached its highest level since electronic records began in 1993.
Victoria Police storm protesters at the Shrine of Remembrance during lockdown
Armoured vehicles were deployed against ordinary Victorians during the lockdown
Many of today’s child offenders lived through Victoria’s world-breaking Covid-19 lockdowns.
This was a period of time beginning in 2020 that saw cops sporting gear straight out of a Mad Max movie to stop kids doing things like playing at the local park.
They arrested their parents for not wearing a mask and unleashed gas, rubber bullets and armoured vehicles on anyone who opposed the lockdown orders.
Respect for police has never quite been the same.
Kids are sponges and they had plenty of time to listen to their parents rag on cops while they were locked up for nearly two years.
These days it’s not unusual to see kids loitering around shops dressed like they’re about to commit a bank robbery – they actually think balaclavas are a normal dress item like a hat.
Do Victorians want to see kids locked up? Do you think they care much for their right to rehabilitation at this moment in time?
I’d argue many couldn’t give a toss about their rights. Lock them up and let us law-abiding citizens live in peace.
Dan Andrews (above)
Crime had been bad leading into the lockdowns.
Remember the Apex Gang? Probably not. These thugs were menacing Victorians in very much the same way gangs are today.
Melbourne’s Herald Sun had been banging on about youth gangs up until lockdowns sorted the problem.
Today that newspaper has been running an endless front-page campaign highlighting youth violence.
It isn’t a beat up.
The nightly news often opens with new footage of ordinary citizens being carjacked or their homes being invaded.
Earlier this month a fight between African gangs escalated from a car park to the Broadmeadows Central Shopping Centre, with people hiding in stores amid screams.
The very next day a man was stabbed and almost killed at Reservoir train station.
The Apex Gang caused fear and carnage across Melbourne before the Covid 19 lockdowns
A youth is arrested by police over the Luna Park attack
A father and son were allegedly stabbed in a random attack outside Crown casino and a machete gang allegedly chased and hacked up a man at Fountain Gate Shopping Centre.
Then just days ago three men charged over a machete brawl outside Melbourne’s Luna Park were freed on bail despite police urging magistrates to keep the trio locked up.
One kid accused of stabbing to death Dau Akueng, 15, and Chol Achiek, 12, refused to board the prison van to attend court.
This is a state where our youth detention centres have a policy of not forcing offenders to front court, but instead negotiate with them, offering ‘support and encouragement’.
This all happened in October.
It was also a month that saw protesters attack police with rocks during an anti-immigration protest.
In refreshing scenes, Victoria Police Commander Wayne Cheeseman called out the ‘leftie’ do-gooders who ‘picked a fight’ with cops rather than the March for Australia group.
‘The people that came to pick the fight with police are the issue-motivated groups on the left,’ Mr Cheeseman said.
Superintendent Wayne Cheeseman emptied a box of large rocks at a press conference and explained the projectiles were used with the intent to harm police officers
‘I can tell you that the March for Australia group were peaceful, they were engaging, they listened to our instructions, they did what they were told, and they protested by example.’
He was talking about the same kind of zealots who defended lockdown Premier Dan Andrews as he went about destroying our state.
Then there’s the ongoing tobacco wars that have been a hot topic in the city for the past two years.
Arson offences in Victoria have increased by 68 per cent since 2023.
This is largely due to the war that stems directly from the ludicrously high taxes on cigarettes.
Crime figure Kaz Hamad has been linked to more than 100 tobacco shop attacks.
The war erupted around March 2023 as organised crime syndicates battled for control of Victoria’s lucrative illicit tobacco market, which is worth billions nationally.
The fight for control has resulted in firebombings, carjackings, stabbings and tit-for-tat revenge attacks.
Katie Tangey died in a targeted house fire in Truganina, in Melbourne’s west, in the early hours of January 16 in a bungled arson attack believed to have been organised by Hamad.
Katie Tangey was burnt alive in a case of mistaken identity – a victim of Melbourne’s tobacco wars
Kaz Hamad (pictured) is believed to be behind the bungled attack that killed Ms Tangey
She was completely innocent and died alongside her brother’s dog, who she was looking after while he was away.
Then you have to think about the mental health crisis in this state that contributes to even more crime.
In March last year, Carly Pirronelli, 26, was shot dead by police after she stabbed her own mother to death in Lower Plenty, 16km north-east of the Melbourne CBD.
Her worried mother had fought in vain to have her committed to a psychiatric ward.
Pirronelli, who was on bail for an unrelated matter and the subject of an apprehended violence order, was gunned down by a police officer and died at the scene.
After the alleged city stabbing of Ms Lai, Victorian Alcohol and Drug Association chief executive Chris Christoforou told the Herald Sun Ms Lai’s ordeal highlighted the need for the state to make sure people struggling with mental health or substance issues, particularly those in the justice system, could access appropriate support when they needed it.
‘That’s an area that does need particular focus,’ he said, adding: ‘If we’re going to make it harder for people to get bail as a result of the changes in the bail law … then we’ve got to make sure that those pathways out of the justice system into community supports are a lot better.’
The courts remain littered with horror stories involving mentally ill men and women who are accused of horrific crimes.
In August, barrister James McQuillan suggested burning people alive in this state was now ‘accepted practice’ by Victorian villains.
John and Courtney Herron (above) in happier times. She was brutally killed by Henry Hammond – a sadistic loser who plans to be free anytime soon
Henry Hammond (above) Hammond was found not guilty of her murder due to mental impairment in August 2020 and sent to Thomas Embling Hospital. Since then he has been spotted out and about on supervised day release in the very same areas where his victim once enjoyed spending time
He made the comments while defending Jordan Spencer – a woman who poured petrol on Paris Carpio’s head and set her on fire outside a Middlesex Crescent home in Shepparton, in Victoria’s north, on January 15, 2024.
Every crook these days has a crack at running a mental impairment defence.
Forensic psychiatrists have so much work they can’t keep up with it.
Those that successfully get off murders by way of mental impairment are told they’ll spend decades at Thomas Embling Hospital – a mental hospital for the criminally insane where male and female ‘patients’ mingle together.
I’ve watched killers walk from there just years after committing horrible crimes.
Doctors front court and say they’re cured and the matters are promptly suppressed by the judge so the public never knows.
Ask John Herron how he feels about that.
His daughter Courtney Herron, 25, was beaten to death by Henry Hammond, 32, in Parkville’s Royal Park in 2019.
Premier Jacinta Allan thought banning machetes was a good idea
Hammond was found not guilty of her murder due to mental impairment in August 2020 and sent to Thomas Embling Hospital.
Since then he has been spotted out and about on supervised day release in the very same areas where his victim once enjoyed spending time.
When Mr Herron – a respected criminal lawyer – attempted to argue against moves to suppress Hammond’s name from history he was treated with contempt by a Supreme Court judge.
In Victoria, the justice system suggests life is cheap.
Even when deals aren’t struck, sentences often disappoint and are rarely appealed to higher courts.
Andrews’ disciple and current Premier Jacinta Allan has continued to infuriate Victorians with her soft approach to crime.
Interestingly, outspoken WAG and social media influencer Rebecca Judd described Victoria’s crime statistics as a ‘huge problem’.
In March, Judd took aim at Andrews saying he could’ve saved lives if he fixed Melbourne’s crime scourge while in power.
Former footy WAG Bec Judd has been vocal in her attacks on the State Government’s failure to halt violent crime
She called him ‘the Dictator’ in a social media post to her 750,000-plus Instagram followers after Ms Allan announced the harsher bail laws.
‘Imagine the lives that could’ve been saved. Imagine the terror experienced by so many Victorians that could’ve been stopped if the Dictator had acted when I called this out,’ she stated.
‘Today Jacinta Allan has announced the toughest bail laws in the country. Yes it is too late for so many but it is a start.
‘And mark my words, if the government stuffs this up again, I will continue to let everyone know about it.
‘I am a mum and proud Victorian who just wants my beloved Melbourne to go back to being the best city in the world where everybody feels safe to live their lives.’
Allan is a politician who thinks she’s done right by tinkering with bail laws watered down by her predecessor.
But legal experts claim the changes made by Allan are a sham.
As it stands, the legislation still encourages the judiciary to release accused youth criminals on bail wherever possible.
Legal experts claim the changes made to bail laws by Jacinta Allan are a sham
The updated manual also instructs judicial officers that granting bail may ultimately be in the best interests of the community in the long-term.
Those close to the Premier claim she is keen to do more to strengthen bail laws but is being dictated to by others within the party.
Melburnians can’t even defend themselves in their own homes without fear of being prosecuted themselves. Forget about smacking a home invader over the head with a baseball bat – you’ll go to jail.
When Libertarian MP David Limbrick tried to amend self-defence laws to give residents more power to protect their home and family he was shot down in flames.
The Allan government voted against a review of the state’s self-defence laws.
It would have compelled the Victorian Law Reform Commission to examine the application of ‘castle doctrine’ in the UK, which allows individuals to use potentially deadly force to defend themselves against intruders.
The motion was defeated by a single vote, 18 to 17, with Labor joining with the Greens and Animal Justice Party MP Georgie Purcell to block its passage.
Just this week former Special Forces commando and war hero Paul Cale began advertising a self-defence course designed entirely to help scared Melburnians legally defend themselves in their own homes.
War hero Paul Cale hopes to help frightened Victorians by showing them how to legally defend themselves against home invaders
The four-hour, $250 course is advertised as teaching ‘everyday households simple, legal, and effective methods to deter, detect, and respond to home invasion threats’.
‘Participants learn proven tactics, techniques, and procedures used by the world’s most elite protection units to create rings of security around and within their homes,’ Cale states.
The veteran soldier goes a step further and guarantees participants he will ‘personally review the evidence and provide expert testimony in court – at no additional fee, other than reimbursement for out-of-pocket expenses’ to anyone who gets charged by cops for defending their homes after completing his course.
So who killed Victoria’s economy? You need look no further than Dan Andrews and his merry band of lunatics.
This is a man who will get a bronze statue erected in his honour for his services to Victorians.
Now I’m no economics expert and these things are probably best left analysed by my colleague Peter van Onselen, but we all remember how much cash the state government flushed down the drain during lockdown.
Not to mention the billion-dollar plus payout Andrews made when he overturned plans to build the East West Link toll road.
People were being handed over cash for staying home during lockdown – often more cash than they would have earned had they been allowed to work.
An AI image of what Dan Andrews’ statue might look like once erected
Projects in Victoria seem to take forever to complete and some of them are just head-scratchers – take the Suburban Rail Loop which is expected to cost more than $100billion.
The Victorian Government recently announced one section was expected to cost between $30billion to $34.5billion and be running by 2035.
Just the other day, van Onselen highlighted issues with Allan’s moves to legislate a right to work from home.
‘Doing business is already hard in Victoria in the wake of the pandemic, but this move could add to the difficulties,’ he wrote.
‘Business groups aren’t crying wolf when they say this could trigger an exodus from Victoria. South Australia is already publicly pitching to poach Victorian companies if the proposed law passes – a Labor state that knows what it’s doing!’
He thinks if Allan was serious about helping working parents or boosting workforce participation, she’d be investing in childcare access, overhauling commuter infrastructure (a disaster in parts of Melbourne), or subsidising remote tech support for regional workers.
Whatever the case, Melbourne is no longer known globally as the most liveable city in the world, which I always found slightly confusing anyway.
We love sport, coffee, good food and live music. We still do, but none of that can compensate for the corpse of a state Victoria has become.
Melbourne is pretty as a picture from a distance. Just don’t get too close to its grubby centre
Melbourne has the MCG, where AFL has been watered down to touch footy
AFL went soft, coffee is expensive, restaurants go bust in 30 seconds and live music has been killed by sky-high insurance bills and noise-hating flogs who buy properties near such venues.
Our weather has never been great, which makes it even more head-scratching that our main theme parks seem to focus on waterslides.
And who can even afford to have a good time in Melbourne anymore? People are broke and the price of fun is ridiculous.
When it comes to out-of-control crime – to be fair on cops walking the beat, what can they do? They lock up crooks and the courts let them walk free.
It’s true, the world is sick, and Melbourne is the worst it’s ever been.
Talk to people and they’ll say they’d pack up and move if they didn’t have kids at school or elderly parents to worry about.
As it stands, the solution for ordinary folk is to stay at home, lock your doors and pray your kids get home safe.
Or just get the hell out of here.
