The postpartum period is a fragile and often thankless time. A new mother’s body has just performed a biological miracle, and her entire world now revolves around a tiny, demanding human. You hope your partner sees a hero, a warrior who is navigating the beautiful, messy aftermath of creating life.
You certainly don’t expect them to see a fixer-upper project. For one new mom, the man who was supposed to be her biggest supporter had become her harshest critic, a man who saw her postpartum body as a problem that needed to be solved with a quick-fix medicine and a heavy dose of criticism.
More info: Reddit
The postpartum period is a time for support and grace as a woman navigates all the changes her body has to endure
Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / Freepik (not the actual photo)
A new mom was ‘very upset’ after her husband asked her to get on weight loss medication while she was still breastfeeding
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
He then admitted he ‘didn’t care about her health’ and just needed her to be more ‘appealing to him’
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
For his birthday, she got fully dressed up in a dress he used to love, hoping to please him
Image credits: stjohnsworrywort
She couldn’t help but feel hopeless, realizing nothing she does will ever be good enough for him
A woman who has been married for 15 years and is still breastfeeding her 22-month-old child found herself at the receiving end of a cruel campaign from her husband. Her body, which has carried and nourished their child, has obviously changed. His first brilliant suggestion was that she ask her doctor for a GLP-1 weight loss medicine, even though he was the one who pushed her to breastfeed for 2 years.
When she returned from her physical with the doctor’s official “no” on the prescription, her husband delivered a moment of soul-crushing honesty. He admitted he “didn’t really care about her health” and just needed her to put more effort into “being more appealing to him.” His concern turned out to be for his own visual satisfaction.
But she decided to make one last, good-faith effort. For his birthday, she got fully dressed up in an attempt to meet his shallow demands. It was pure, uncut cruelty. “I appreciate you wore the dress,” he said, “but it really doesn’t look the same anymore.” He followed this up with a suggestion that she take friends shopping so she doesn’t pick out clothes she “doesn’t look good in.”
The poor mother was left completely “slapped down” and “discouraged.” Every attempt she makes to please him is met with a new, more cutting insult. She’s trapped in a no-win situation, realizing that even if she loses the weight, she can never get back the body she had in her 20s, the only thing he seems to want. Shall we mention that she even has a healthy BMI of 24? Disgusting.
Image credits: benzoix / Freepik (not the actual photo)
First and foremost, the husband’s entire premise is based on a completely distorted view of health. A BMI of 24, as the narrator currently has, is squarely within the “healthy weight” range for an adult woman, according to Liv Hospital. His push for her to lose weight is purely an aesthetic demand that has no basis in actual medical science. He is not her doctor; he is a critic.
His suggestion that she take a GLP-1 weight-loss medicine while still breastfeeding is not just insensitive; it is medically irresponsible. Dr. Fatima Cody Stanford strongly advises against taking these medications while pregnant or breastfeeding because their effects on a developing baby are completely unknown. “Just don’t do it,” she says.
The physical changes she’s describing are a completely normal and expected part of the postpartum journey. Everyday Health tells us that the body undergoes significant changes to support milk production, including storing fat in different areas. His criticism of her “belly fat” is a critique of the very biological processes that are nourishing their child, a child he insisted she breastfeed for two years.
Saying that he “didn’t really care about her health” was the most honest and damning thing he said. He has made it clear that his desire for a specific physical aesthetic is more important to him than her health, her feelings, or even the safety of their breastfeeding child. There is a long and hard road ahead for this postpartum mom, and we can only hope she learns how beautiful her body is for creating the miracle of life.
How would you have responded to these kinds of remarks? Let’s spit fire together in the comments section!
The internet was utterly horrified by his cruelty, and also reminded her what an untrustworthy metric a BMI truly is
