A man had his life changed forever after he discovered his childhood best friend was actually his brother.
Graham Hearsey, 60, from Kent, grew up with suspicions that his father, Joe, wasn’t his biological father because of his ginger hair.
The carer from Margate also grew up hearing rumours that he shared a father with his childhood best friend before he finally decided to order a DNA test online after he was hospitalised with heart failure in April.
He reached out to his friend, David Joyce, 59, on the job search platform Indeed after they lost contact 40 years ago and asked if he wanted to order a test kit too.
The pair submitted cheek swabs for analysis, and three weeks later, Graham’s suspicions were confirmed when David rang him saying, ‘Hello, brother’.
After four decades of not being in each other’s lives, Graham and David have now reunited as biological brothers.
‘I really wanted to know the truth, as I didn’t know if I was going to be coming out again,’ Graham said. ‘I was in the hospital with heart failure. I wanted to put that all to rest.
‘I can’t say I wanted Joe to be my father,’ he continued, reflecting on a tumultuous upbringing.
Graham Hearsey (left), 60, from Kent, had his life change forever when he learned his childhood best friend, David Joyce (right), 59, is actually his brother
‘It was a shock. I can’t say I wanted Joe to be my dad,’ he continued: ‘Joe always said, ‘I don’t want that David in here.’
‘Maybe he did have a suspicion, as I was always allowed at David’s, but he wasn’t allowed at ours.’
Graham’s ginger hair caused quite a stir in the family when he was a baby.
Growing up, Graham said there was a suspicion because of his ginger hair, but his mother was able to explain it away.
Graham said: ‘There was always a slight suspicion, but my mother reassured my father that I was his.
‘When I was born, I had this ginger hair. My mother said that there’s a ginger child in every family.
‘My mother’s sister had a girl who was ginger, and her other sister had a boy who had ginger hair.
‘She convinced him, and apparently, there was a letter she wrote to say that I was actually his.’
Graham decided to find out if David was his brother once and for all after he was hospitalised with heart failure in April
Pictured: 60-year-old Graham is pictured with his sisters Julie and Pamela during their childhood
Throughout his childhood, Graham’s mother was in and out of psychiatric wards, so Graham and his four sisters were mainly raised by his father or family friends.
David’s family lived only a street away from Graham’s childhood home.
In the first few months of Graham’s life, his mother was sectioned, and Joe didn’t believe he was his child, so the Joyce family took care of him when he was a baby.
Graham recalled: ‘For the first few months of my life, my mother was sectioned. She went straight back to the hospital. My father went up to their house and dropped me off on the doorstep.
‘He said that I’m not his, so they brought me up for the first six months to a year.’
Only three months after Graham was born, David was born to the Joyce family. The pair were close friends growing up and were akin to brothers.
Graham said: ‘I was born in May ’66 and David was born in August ’66. We both shared a cot!’
He was eventually returned to his parents’ care, but says that he had a difficult childhood.
David, who rang Graham up after finding out the DNA test results and said, ‘Hello brother,’ is pictured during his youth
He said: ‘I’ve got no recollection of being brought up by my father. There was no love between us, I was free to do whatever I wanted. If I weren’t home by 11pm, the door was locked. Sometimes I had to sleep out.’
Graham’s childhood was often spent having fun with David. But in 1984, aged 18, the pair lost contact and went their separate ways.
He said: ‘David and I had a brilliant time. He lived on the next street. We both had ginger hair at the time. We were always in and out of trouble together. Eventually, we went our separate ways – David joined the army, and I got married.’
Joe, who believed he was Graham’s father, died in 2009 from lung cancer.
David’s father, and Graham’s biological father, also died in 2000, but Graham only met him once as a child.
‘I only saw my real dad once. David and I were about 10. We were going to the cinema in West Gate, and that was the only time I saw him.’
It was during his stay in the hospital that Graham reached out to David again in an unusual way.
‘When you’re stuck in a hospital, you get curious. I found David on Indeed. I contacted him and said, ‘Why don’t we do this DNA test and see for real?’ He did the test, and his results came back.’
After waiting for 58 years to know who his real father was, Graham finally had an answer.
Knowing that David is his brother has changed Graham’s life completely, and the Joyce family have accepted him as one of their own.
Graham said: ‘Having David, it’s amazing. It’s the best feeling – we cuddled and cried. It’s been accepted by both families. It’s been really nice.
‘I contacted my sisters and said, ‘Dad’s not my dad. David’s dad is my dad’. They were so understanding.
‘We made a WhatsApp group and we keep in touch. Every day we WhatsApp, saying ‘Morning’.’
Since discovering his family, Graham says he ‘feels like a new man’ both emotionally and physically, after a successful heart ablation.
David added: ‘We grew up together, schooling and everything. We had similarities between us, looks and the same coloured hair. But we also had this bond. The DNA test was just confirmation, really.
He went on to joke, ‘I need to chase to him up for backdated Christmas and birthday presents!’
