Cooking for a large group can be challenging, with different preferences, needs and restrictions. However, there is clearly a difference between having a slightly skewed ratio of vegan to non-vegan dishes and purposefully including something someone can’t eat in everything.
A woman turned to the internet to share her story of horrible in-laws. One Thanksgiving, despite knowing her aversion to pork, her sister-in-law decided to somehow make every product contain some of it. Years later, her mother-in-law wanted to make peace. We got in touch with the woman who made the post and she was kind enough to share some more details.
In-law drama can range from annoying to horrific
Image credits: EyeEm/Freepik (not the actual photo)
But one woman’s relatives purposefully sabotaged a Thanksgiving dinner
Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: EyeEm/Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits:Freepik (not the actual photo)
She gave some clarifications later
Image credits: EyeEm/Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Opposite-Yak-9631
The woman was willing to share some of her thoughts about her experience
Image credits: EyeEm/Freepik (not the actual photo)
Bored Panda got in touch with the woman who made the post and she was kind enough to share some more details with us. Given the popularity of her story, we wanted to hear her thoughts on why so many may have resonated with it. “I actually was shocked to see over 1.1k up votes happened, I see a lot of people had issues with the initial post, and I updated it with the honest truth,” she shared.
“I think people were just as shocked to hear my experience as much as I experienced it. Living in the south, being married to Ace, and meeting his family, I had never experienced what I went through. The engagement made me realize with some commenters, I’m not alone. Nightmare-in-laws do exist elsewhere, and it does need to be normalized that these situations do happen. A lot of commenters were saying that their families would never treat them like that, but that’s the thing, this isn’t their family.”
“This is my husband’s family that did this to me, racism still exists, even though we all bleed the same. I’m just as human as you are, and we shouldn’t treat each other like this. It needs to be normalized that these things still happen. When I’m working with my father, I have experienced his form of racism from others to himself, and it made me realize, I don’t think people understand that there are still people who do this!” she shared with Bored Panda.
We were also curious to hear if any reader input was actually helpful. “I did find a lot of comments helpful, I’ve screenshotted a few that I will be questioning my mother about if and when she brings it up again. I have a really good relationship with my mom, and she is a really great person and means well. So I can understand that some commenters actually made me realize I don’t think she understood the situation. So when she does ask about it, I’ll make sure to ask the questions I found useful, and help her understand that it really is a bad situation.”
Having your partner in your corner is key
Image credits: Wavebreak Media/Freepik (not the actual photo)
Having your spouse firmly in your corner when dealing with difficult in-laws isn’t just nice to have, it’s absolutely essential for both your sanity and your marriage’s survival. When your partner fails to set boundaries with their family, you become the villain in every story while slowly losing your mind trying to explain why you don’t think your mother-in-law should have a key to your house or opinions about your parenting choices. Research consistently shows that in-law conflicts rank among the top stressors in marriages, and the way couples handle these conflicts directly impacts relationship satisfaction and longevity. A study published in the Journal of Family Psychology found that when one partner feels unsupported against criticism or interference from in-laws, it creates resentment that corrodes the marriage from within. You’re not just fighting with your mother-in-law about holiday plans anymore, you’re fighting with your spouse about why they won’t defend you, which is infinitely worse.
The concept of “leaving and cleaving” exists in relationship psychology for good reason. When you get married, your primary loyalty shifts to your partner, not your parents. This doesn’t mean cutting off family, but it does mean presenting a united front when boundaries get crossed. When a husband tells his mother that his wife’s concerns are valid and will be respected, or when a wife makes clear that her parents can’t override her husband’s parenting decisions, it sends a crucial message that the relationship is the priority.
Without this united front, the partner dealing with toxic in-laws faces an impossible situation where they’re simultaneously expected to maintain peace with people who disrespect them while receiving no backup from the one person who should have their back unconditionally. That’s not a sustainable marriage model, that’s a recipe for divorce.
A few readers also wanted more details
Most thought the woman’s in-laws were being ridiculous
