Felicia LoAlbo Melendez was placed in advanced classes as early as second grade.
She picked up the saxophone in later years, loved playing it in the middle school band and also sang in the school chorus. She enjoyed theater and was excited about performing in the school’s Disney play “Moana” and looked forward to practice.
She was also relentlessly bullied in school, targeted perhaps for her intelligence and interests, or as her mom said, for being “different.” Felicia also continuously sought help from the F.W. Holbein School in Mount Holly, staying true to her positive attitude by even suggesting the administration create a support group for traumatized students.
Felicia was in therapy to help cope with some trauma. Her father, NJ Transit Detective Alexis Melendez, had died in January less than three weeks after receiving a pancreatic cancer diagnosis. He was buried Feb. 4.
What happened to Felicia LoAlbo Melendez?
Elaina LoAlbo said her daughter wanted to go back to school two days later on a Monday, eager to return to play rehearsals.
“I wanted her to stay home another day, but she popped into my bedroom that morning, kissed me like she always does, said she had missed too much play practice and had an idea for her costume and then told me to make pedicure appointments for us,” her mother recalled.
“Unfortunately, she never made it to practice,”
Felicia hanged herself inside a school restroom stall, law enforcement officials have said, and died two days later from complications — one of the rare suicides for children so young.
She was just 11 years old.
“Her voice will not go unheard. It is now time for all of us to use our voices for these kids,” LoAlbo vowed.
As tragic and startling as youth suicide is, it’s hard to know whether Felicia is an extremely rare case or part of a wider and more concerning trend among young children.
A lack of up-to-date data, limited tracking of suicides in children younger than 15, privacy issues that prevent most suicides from being made public and social mores that can make talking about suicide taboo, it is difficult to know how often or why children so young kill themselves.
A recent global study found an increase in suicide among 15-to 19-year-olds, but it did not address younger age groups.
Nationally, suicide of all ages rose four percent in 2021 and roughly 7 percent in the 15-24 age category, but there is no listing for younger children in the Centers for Disease Control report.
Suicide is the second leading cause of death in kids and teens ages 10 to 19 in the U.S., according to the CDC. Additionally, a CDC study of provided data between 1975 and 2016 reveals that while suicide historically has been higher among boys than girls of every age group, the gap has narrowed.
The New Jersey Medical Examiner issued a preliminary report on suicides for the first quarter of this year with an added category for ages 14 and under. Two deaths are listed while 43 died in 2019 in an 11-20 age bracket. The latest report also found overall suicides from 2021 to 2022 rose statewide six percent and rose in most South Jersey counties with the highest county total in 2022 in Burlington.
What’s being done to stop youth suicide?
Youth suicide is preventable, said Dr. Patrick Cleary of Virtua Health in South Jersey
“The vast majority of kids who commit suicide have had an underlying and identifiable mental health condition, such as depression or bipolar or dieting disorders, which may not have been identified in younger children,” Cleary said. “And bullying has high association with depression and other mental disorders.”
Cleary is an adolescent and child psychiastrst who chairs Virtua’s psychiatry department and directs its Castle behavioral health services program for youth in Camden and Berlin.
“The other common factor in suicide is acute stress that some have difficulty handling,” added Cleary, who said he could not comment on Felicia’s suicide because he was not privy to her case.
The nonprofit Uvalde Foundation for Kids is reviewing recent New Jersey student suicides in its overall goal to end all forms of school violence nationwide. The foundation was formed after the May 2022 fatal shooting at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas, and has law enforcement and mental health experts studying school violence, including harassment, intimidation and bullying.
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Foundation founder David Chapin said the nonprofit has renamed its anti-bullying initiative Happy Hope in honor of Felicia whose first and middle name Amel mean “happy hope,” and whom Chapin said “reached out for help from the school and got none.”
“We have a culture of violence in our schools and society that has to change. Schools do little about bullying aside from standard programs,” he said.
Gateway Wellness Center in Bridgeton in South Jersey offers community-based, outpatient treatment and works with families.
“During COVID and even coming out of what we know as this pandemic and its isolation, there has been a significant increase in youth speaking about suicide … and even having those thoughts of ‘I just want to kill myself’ or ‘I don’t want to be here anymore,'” said center director and counselor Ashlee Todd, suggesting kids need more school- and community-based groups and activities.
Social media has heightened but also normalized those suicide thoughts and young people don’t understand those feelings can be overcome, according to Todd.
“If you see a lot of the TikToks, snapchats, you’ll see videos that kind of highlight suicidal ideation or suicidal acts. I don’t believe our youth fully understand that those acts are permanent. They’re kind of glamorized in some of these videos.
If you are in crisis, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 988 or text TALK to 741741.
State resources for help are and https://www.caresolace.com/site/chpsd
Reporters Jim Walsh and Celeste Whittaker contributed to this story.
Carol Comegno loves telling stories about South Jersey life, history and military veterans for the Courier Post, Burlington County Times and The Daily Journal. Call her at 856-486-2473 or email [email protected]. Support local journalism with a subscription.
